INFP Overthinking — Why it isn’t worth it!

Photo by Lili Kovac on Unsplash

An INFP overthinking is a very common phenomenon. Does that person also want to be my friend or do they think I’m annoying? Will I even be good enough at this job or is it not worth applying? Is this blog post worth writing or will no one read it? As INFPs, our introverted and intuitive side has us living in our heads a lot.  Therefore, we tend to overthink and over-analyze even the littlest situations. INFP overthinking is a hard habit to stop, but it is important to be aware when we are doing it. Here are some good reasons why overthinking is not worth it.

The more we think about it, the longer we suffer.

So you finally mustered up the courage to go to a social event and it did not go as planned. You applied for your dream job or school, and you didn’t get it. You asked your crush out, and they rejected you. We could spend time after these events thinking about how awful we feel, but it doesn’t do anything for us. Of course, a good cry and a few days to mope is common after an upsetting event and might actually help. …

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Five Things I Wish People Knew About Talking To INFPs.

As an INFP, there are a few things I would like people to know about talking to us. Don’t get me wrong. Talking to an INFP is actually a very easy thing to do. We are good listeners, we probably won’t judge you harshly, and we are more worried about what we are going to say. However, I think some people might get the wrong impression of me and I wish I could give them a guidebook so they knew where I was coming from.

When I am Silent, I am Thinking.

I actually am a shy person, but often my silence isn’t due to shyness. Usually when I am silent, it is because I need time to form thoughts. There is a reason I hate being put on the spot, or having to go present something with inadequate preparation. Texting and writing is also more comfortable because I can backspace, erase, and think. I was terrible at raising my hand in school not only, because I felt like what I would have to say might not be important, but because by the time I thought of something I wanted to say, the topic had changed. I think that is …

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INFP New Year’s Resolutions: 2017

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

Goodbye and good riddance 2016. While creating my New Year’s resolutions for this year, I thought about how they relate to the INFP personality type. So for you procrastinating INFPs, I have conjured an INFP New Year’s Resolution list for you. Feel free to add these to your own lists if they aren’t there already.

Do that “Creative Thing” more.

Whether it is drawing, writing, singing, or dancing, every INFP enjoys some creative task. They also struggle with doing it consistently. Maybe you are discouraged because you are not the best at it. Maybe you are overwhelmed with all the other things in your life that take up time. Perhaps you spend too much time moping and feeling emotional, getting nothing done. No matter the reason, you know you’d be happier if you spent more time being creative. I know you can give me ten excuses why you can’t. Just know, you probably want to do that creative thing more.

Don’t Spend Your Time on Shitty People. 

Yeah, I’m talking about that person you have given many chances to and forgiven many times. If someone makes you feel bad more than they make you feel happy, consider distancing yourself from …

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Thoughts on INFPs and Routines

As an INFP, I have a love-hate relationship with routines. I have always been envious of others who can lay out a schedule for themselves, and follow it to a T. Previously, I wrote about how INFPs are good at starting things without finishing, and I do just that with routines. I can write out a pretty schedule, make all the calendars and to-do lists in the world, but that’s where I get stuck. It is just so easy to shove it aside after awhile.

I sometimes find routines so limiting. They can keep me from being able to spend my time doing things I want to be doing after all. And when routines are not flexible, it can be miserable.  I am someone who could be perfectly happy spending a whole day in my day dreams, not being very productive. I just don’t feel this sense of urgency that I need to be productive every second of every day. This makes a schedule not a top priority for me. I like the freedom of being able to use my time in a way that will make me happy. That can often mean falling out of routine or off …

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Starting Things And Never Finishing

All my fellow INFPs can probably relay at least many handfuls of times where they started something they never end up finishing. We go into things with such passion and an honest intention of completing them. However, after a few weeks, days, or just hours, we get distracted by something else. This distraction can lead to other distractions. Soon, the passionate project we want to complete continues to only be an idea in our head. INFP seems to stand for I Never Finish Projects.

What Causes Us To Not Finish Projects

1. Aiming too High

Sometimes we create a very robust idea that would take a lot of time and effort. It is not to say it can’t be done, but it just won’t be done as fast as an INFP would like: immediatelySometimes if there is a deadline set for us, the grandiose ideas can’t be accomplished in that time frame. This can cause an INFP to give up completely on the idea because it will never be as good as they wanted. Or they will put things off because they are afraid they won’t be able to meet those expectations. I personally think the phrase “lazy …

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The Dark Side of INFPs

I often found that the description of an INFP can sound something like a happy little imp frolicking through the forest. This same imp lays under the stars dreaming of fantastical creatures. Think Luna Lovegood from Harry Potter, or Lulu from League of Legends. However I know that I and many other INFPs have a dark side to them that doesn’t fit that idealistic image.

INFPs Get Sad or Depressed Easily and Often

The dark side of an INFP can be a sad and lonely one. INFPs often make decisions based on their feelings. That is because we often feel A LOT and very strongly. These lyrics from The Front Bottoms instantly resonated with me and made me think how INFP-like they were:

“When I am sad, I am sad
But when I’m happy, oh god I am happy
there’s just no place in-between for us to meet “

The Front Bottoms – Flashlight

INFPs can often feel overemotional because of how intense our feelings can be. Those feelings allow me to extremely appreciate the nights out with friends laughing, or when someone lets me know I really helped them out by listening to them. However, it can also make …

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Learning To Just DO Without Overthinking

When you spend all your time overthinking, it makes it difficult to get anything done. It can be exhausting thinking so much to the point it halts all your actions. I often find myself wishing I could turn off my brain and enjoy the moment.

INFP’s ability to get lost and live in their head is both a blessing and a curse. I often can spend hours contemplating ideas and different worlds, but then reality comes crashing down. I have to get some work done in the physical, as opposed to, imaginative world. When it comes to the real world, I often find it very hard to improvise. You know those people you have worked with on a school project who have not prepared at all for the upcoming presentation? But then they wing it and sound comfortable and knowledgeable? Then there is me who has left the project until the last minute, but stayed up all night trying to prepare. Regardless of my preparation time, I let out a fraction of what I planned to say. And along the way, also eliminated all my “funny” jokes I was going to throw in.

It is not only presentations, but just …

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Five Common Struggles of an INFP

As an INFP, I often wonder if life would be easier as a different MBTI type. While there are many good sides to being an INFP, there are also many things INFPs struggle with. Here are a few common INFP struggles I have encountered.

1. Seeming Distant But Caring A LOT

INFPs often do not have many friends, but instead choose to have a few close ones. However, they can often seem distant even to close friends. That partially comes from being an introvert and wanting alone space and time. As an INFP, I can get so lost in my head that the simple task of sending a text could take a few days. It is important to remember to take time to check in on friends and be the one to initiate the conversation once in awhile. It sometimes is difficult to show my feelings on my face or in my words. Being able to communicate through writing allows INFPs to share their feelings in a comfortable way. Having time to think through their words can allow for more meaningful communication at their own pace.

2. Not Knowing What To Do in Life

This is a common problem among …

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